a lot of advice needed!

Subject: a lot of advice needed! Thu Jul 17, 2008 4:19 pm

I didnt no where to post this because i need advice on loads of different areas so i've put it in general.

Ok, i got a call an hour ago to tell me my operation date for the cyst on my ovary to be removed and for the 'fentons procedure' as my bits havent healed properly (according to gynocologist) 7 month after having baby or i've been overstitched when had 2nd degree tearing (according to GP). Sex is extremly sore so need procedure done!

Anyway, the date is 29th august so we've got 5 week until the date to put bethany in some sort of routine. We've never had a 'routine' we've just sort of done things at our own pace, fed on demand, introducing solids slowly via BLW. So she still takes my milk loads and solids very little. Which has been great so far but i think this will now have to change and i'm going to have to start getting her into some sort of a routine for when i'm in hospital.

I dont no where to start with it all! Especially due to the fact that i dont no how long i will be in hospital for and what type of op they will do. Basically i have signed the consent form for key hole surgery if there is a surgeon available on the day to do it. This means that i'll be in the hospital a couple of days and recovery time will be 1-3 week. If a surgeon isnt available i have to have open surgery and i'll be in hospital about a week and recovery is 6-8 week. The first one is better but i will only find out on the day of the surgery iconsad

. Also they may let baby be with me for some of the day but as it is a gyno ward they told me she wouldnt be able to stay over night due to women on the ward having lost babies and haing hysterectomy's,etc. Which i understand having been on that ward myself once.

I just dont no how to get her into a routine! Firstly, she will only take milk from me and wont feed from cup/bottle. I am worried that although i will be able to feed her during the day at hospital i may be in some pain and will be difficult to hold her to feed if i have the open surgery! What should i do about milk feeds?

Secondly, she currently doesnt really take much solids at all. I will give her some finger foods for dinner and tea but she doesnt really take much of them and is just experimenting. She still feeds as much as she has before solids. Do you think i should start pureeing food as well to try and up her intake of solids so that she is used to this when i am unable to feed her?

Thirdly we are co-sleeping. I am wandering whether to start to try her in her own room in her cot sooner rather than later. I am thinking this may help her settle more if i start doing it now for when i am in hospital. Because i am just thinking if i am suddenly not there in bed with her when i am in hospital it may upset her more.

Any advice greatly appreciated! Rolling Eyes

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Subject: Re: a lot of advice needed! Thu Jul 17, 2008 4:38 pm

you must be frantic.
Im sure some of the other girls will have some good tips & advice, im doing same as you so not a lot of help im afraid.
Only thing i can think of is that you explain to hospital that she is exclusively

and so could they consider you staying on the maternity ward so Bethany can be with you.
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Subject: Re: a lot of advice needed! Thu Jul 17, 2008 4:43 pm

for now, I'll post later!!!!

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Subject: Re: a lot of advice needed! Thu Jul 17, 2008 4:57 pm

thanks jane and katie. it is worth me asking about the maternity ward. i'll wait for the letter to arrive then i will. god i'm so stressed

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Subject: Re: a lot of advice needed! Thu Jul 17, 2008 5:19 pm

First off all

! you can do it!!!! I'm sorry its all happening, but once its done you'll feel better and be more confident and "everything else" will get back to norm Wink

Five weeks is a lot time to prepare!
First: I would start expressing milk, regardless will you need it or not: build up a rtash enough to last 3 days minimum- what ,means you'll need around 72-78 oz in freezer. Sound a lot, but then you have a month to do it, and if you pump 3 oz a day over period of 28 days it will add up to 74oz!!! (if my maths is good iconredface

) You could leave sippy cup with couple of oz for her to play with, and she'll have sip here and there- mummy's milk is soooo nice Wink

hard to resist.
Then you'll need to find out what anesthesia you'll be given and check is it suitable for bf- we'll do it for you Wink

there is great advice on KM about anesthesia http://www.kellymom.com/health/meds/anesthetics.html and for post surgery pain managment: http://www.kellymom.com/health/meds/pain-meds.html
Now:
I think you sould start working on new routine: offer milk from sippy cup more often and someone else should do this- as hard it sounds, some babies never will take bottle with mummy's milk if fresh is aviable just there Wink

Can daddy cosleep alone with Bethany? Could he be offering milk in a bottle or spill proof sippy cup at night and you have few nights on sofa or different bed- just to try it on? You could start with someone else putting her to bed and go to bed later, increasing day after day time when you are not there.

I wouldn't worry about purés, Helen, as milk is main nutrient provider and solids are just for play; even if you go with puré and increase them she'll still need 24-28 oz of bm a day till she is one- this is best for her development and growth. I know some mums say "my 7 m old is bf 3 times a day and is on 6 meals a day" Rolling Eyes

but with all respect to them its all dog's bum talking.

Who will be with Bethany while you are away? will you have someone to help you while you recover?
:aww:Sorry Maya just fell asleep on my arm, its hard to type. Post more questions if you have them and I'm going to put thinking cap on today too

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Age : 26 Joined : 20 Aug 2007 Posts : 1114

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love Angela! xxx

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Age : 27 Joined : 08 May 2008 Posts : 700 From : Staffs

Sorry I cant be any help

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Subject: Re: a lot of advice needed! Thu Jul 17, 2008 6:44 pm

Thanks soo much katie

my mum is going to use the rest of her holiday days she has left from work so that will be a week. adam is also gonna have a week off also. so thats 2 weeks that i will have someone here to help why i recover.

I will start expressing today - 3oz a day defo sounds manageable! Should i save in 2oz's in freezer do you think? So as not to waste it?

I've not properly spoken to adam about the sleeping arrangements as he went to work soon after hospital phoned. But i dont think he feels comfortable about co-sleeping by himself with her. Will have a proper chat tomorrow with him. Hopefully he will co-sleep with her i dont really want my little baby in her own room yet - she's still to little lol i'm a soft cow! lol. then over the weekend we can have a little test drive and i'll sleep in the other room.

As soon as i receive the opperation letter from them i will phone them and ask about the anesthesia they'll be using. I might ask them to put the proposed anesthesia in writing so that i have the correct spellings Laughing

Everything feels to be happening at once. First i start stressing about leaving her to go back to work. Now i've decided to tell them to stick there job and i still have to be away from her runtear

I have to try to think positive though - its so bloody hard though!
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Subject: Re: a lot of advice needed! Thu Jul 17, 2008 6:46 pm

thanks girls

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Subject: Re: a lot of advice needed! Thu Jul 17, 2008 6:57 pm

Helen - they should be able to offer you a side room hun so Bethany can stay.
My friend had something similar - her OH was allowed to stay on put-up-bed, and baby stayed too.

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Subject: Re: a lot of advice needed! Thu Jul 17, 2008 7:01 pm

Joined : 28 Aug 2007 Posts : 36 From : Hertfordshire

I too think getting your own private bedroom is doable. Also the maternity ward idea sounds good as well.

I think keep banging on at the hospital until you get what you want. Sometimes it pays to be persistent.

Subject: Re: a lot of advice needed! Thu Jul 17, 2008 10:05 pm

Helen - i asked my friend, and she paid for a room at a cost of £13 a night.
Might be worth asking.

Be persistant - im sure they will come up with something

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Age : 26 Joined : 14 Aug 2007 Posts : 1328

Subject: Re: a lot of advice needed! Fri Jul 18, 2008 1:06 am

i hope i get one too. My gp said i should be able to! Just wandering - if i spoke to someone from la leche or a local breastfeeding group/counsellor do you think they would speak to the hospital too? hospitals are supposed to be for

now so i cant understand it why they wont accomodate me more!
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